A “sten do” is a fresh term that describes a joint stag and hen party – both parties that are typically thrown before the wedding – but instead of separate celebrations, a couple can choose to celebrate with their mutual friends and families. Sten dos have become more popular as couples seek unique and inclusive ways to start their marriage journey, allowing couples to share the fun and excitement leading up to their big day, streamlining the planning process, and can often be more cost-effective.
You may have already read our guide on how to organise a stag or hen do, and while those tips still apply, a sten do needs to be inclusive for all. Plus, with both sides coming together, the potential for hilarious antics and unforgettable memories is doubled! Let’s explore some of the best sten do ideas to make this joint celebration unforgettable.
What is a sten do?
A sten do merges the traditional stag (bachelor party) and hen do (bachelorette party) into one grand celebration, bringing together both the bride and groom’s friends and family.
This modern approach to pre-wedding festivities creates an opportunity for everyone to unite and celebrate the upcoming nuptials as one cohesive group. It’s perfect for couples who have overlapping social circles or those who simply want to enjoy their pre-wedding festivities side by side.
Activities for a sten do can vary, from relaxed gatherings like group dinners or nights out to more organised events such as weekend trips, adventurous outings, or themed parties, offering a diverse array of celebratory choices that cater to the tastes of all attendees.
What are the benefits of a sten do?
So now that we know what a sten do is, what are the actual benefits to having one over hosting a separate stag and hen dos? If you’re not entirely sold, perhaps some of these combo stag and hen party benefits may sway you:
1. It’s inclusive
A sten do breaks down the traditional gender barriers by including everyone in the festivities, regardless of gender. This inclusive approach ensures that no one feels left out and can strengthen friendships between both parties’ friends and families.
2. It can be cost-effective
Hosting one combined event can be more economical than organising two separate dos. This can lead to savings on venue rentals, transportation, and activities, as bulk bookings often come with discounts. It could even help you cut costs on your wedding!
3. Experience shared memories
Celebrating together means couples can share the joy and memorable moments of their pre-wedding celebration with each other, rather than hearing about each other’s experiences afterwards. It also allows for creating shared memories with their entire circle of friends and families – bringing everyone closer. Speaking of…
4. It can strengthen bonds
A sten do provides an opportunity for the bride’s and groom’s friends and families to get to know each other before the wedding. This can help in building a stronger, more unified community around the couple, enhancing the sense of support and togetherness, as well as helping to ease any pre-wedding tension.
5. It streamlines planning
Planning one event instead of two can significantly reduce the stress and time commitment required from the couple and their wedding party. This approach means fewer logistics to manage, from invitations to scheduling activities. Instead, everyone can meet in one place on the same date and time.
Planning the perfect sten do
Pulling off an epic sten do requires careful planning to ensure everyone has an unforgettable experience, but also that everyone agrees on the activities planned for the day, and night! Here are some key factors to consider to ensure everyone is cordial:
1. Group size
While we believe sten dos work best with an intimate group (around 4-10 people), you can also use the opportunity to invite as many people as you reasonably can – particularly if some can’t make the wedding itself. For example, with our private hire options, you can invite up to 46 people (and 30 at our Brighton site)!
Just be wary of inviting too many people, as it can become difficult to coordinate. And too few and you may miss out on that electric group dynamic.
2. Budget
Decide upfront how much you and all of your guests are willing to spend. While it may be fun to party abroad, it may not be feasible for others. Plus, having a budget lets you select activities aligned with what everyone can realistically afford.
3. Location
Unless you’re sticking to a single venue, map out a rough area for your sten do. Will you be going to multiple venues or just one? And how will you factor in travel and the associated costs?
4. The schedule
While spontaneity is certainly part of the fun, you’ll still want a loose schedule to keep things on track. Build in buffer time between activities to avoid everyone feeling rushed. Start earlier for a more relaxed pace, or later for a high-energy night. Keep in mind that most stag and hen dos last 4-6 hours, but you know your crew best – so plan accordingly.
Best sten do Ideas
So now that the important stuff is out of the way – let’s get down to the fun stuff, the activities!
But where should you begin? Here are tons of sten do ideas that can cater to groups who want something lively, chill, boozy or relaxing:
1. Alcotraz: an immersive bar experience
As you step into the hidden speakeasy (in one of six Alcotraz locations), you’ll find yourself surrounded by bootleggers, and law enforcement agents locked in a thrilling game of cat and mouse. Alcotraz is an immersive bar experience, complete with interactive actors, and craft cocktails served with your BYOB contraband. It’s the perfect immersive bar experience you simply won’t find anywhere else.
Why it’s great for a sten do: An Alcotraz hen do is an experience like no other, but that doesn’t mean it has to be limited to the hens! Plus, it can be made into a boozy or non-boozy outing, meaning it’s suitable for all to enjoy.
2. Speakeasy bar crawl
Once your experience is up with Alcotraz, consider carrying on the speakeasy fun! Explore the hidden gem bars in your city to keep the night going. Discover all kinds of weird and wonderful cocktails and bond over your shared love for new discoveries.
Why it’s great for a sten do: Speakeasies are fun to discover. Plus, it makes for a different kind of bar crawl than visiting common watering holes in your local area.
Not sure where to go? Check out which cities have the best night life in our ultimate guide!
3. Escape room
Put your problem-solving skills to the test with an escape room experience. Work together with your group to unravel clues, solve puzzles, and ultimately escape the room before time runs out. Many escape rooms offer themed adventures, from haunted asylums to art heists.
Why it’s great for a sten do: Most escape rooms allow for small groups only. This is great if you want to have a small sten do, and it means you can all put your heads together to escape the room of your choosing!
4. Murder mystery dinners
Become a part of an interactive “whodunnit” story during a murder mystery dinner. Dine on a multi-course meal while actors present a fictional crime case, and you’ll need to gather clues and interrogate suspects to solve the mystery.
And if murder mysteries aren’t everyone’s thing – there are absolutely tons of themed dinners you can choose from!
Why it’s great for a sten do: Sten dos that require working together are always a winner. It strengthens bonds, gets your brain’s cogs turning and is an opportunity to have some friendly competition.
5. Virtual reality arcades
For the gamers among you, a VR arcade is a fantastic sten do idea. Step into fantastic virtual worlds at a VR arcade to experience heart-pounding adventures to mind-bending puzzles. You and your crew will be fully immersed in these cutting-edge experiences. Plus, it makes a great activity for a sober night out!
Why it’s great for a sten do: VR environments can be made fun, challenging and even scary! This makes it a great catch-all activity that everyone can enjoy on a sten do.
6. Rage rooms
Get your sten do crew to let off some steam and unleash inner rage at a rage room experience. Everyone will be provided with protective gear and an array of breakable items to smash and destroy in a safe, controlled environment.
Why it’s great for a sten do: With pre-wedding stress, it may be no surprise that tensions may be high. Get all the tension out with an experience everyone can enjoy. Just keep in mind that a rage room experience for a sten do should be limited to small groups for safety!
7. Axe throwing
Channel your inner lumberjack at an axe-throwing bar, where you can learn the art of hurling axes at wooden targets while enjoying drinks and snacks.
Why it’s great for a sten do: This activity can be non-alcoholic, but like rage rooms, may be a great way to relieve tension! Plus, axe throwing is fun yet challenging, so you can all laugh about your axe-throwing skills (if any!) together.
8. Aerial adventure parks
Get your adrenaline pumping at an aerial adventure park, where you’ll navigate through high-ropes courses, zip lines, and other challenging obstacles suspended in the air.
Why it’s great for a sten do: For those that love heights (or want to challenge themselves), aerial adventures and ziplining are activities that can be done at most times of day. This is great for sten dos where people can’t make it at night, or want to try an activity that doesn’t revolve around food and/or alcohol.
9. Paint and sips
Unleash your inner artist at a boozy painting night, where you’ll sip on cocktails and follow step-by-step instructions to create your own imitations of a painting or piece of art. Have fun comparing your *cough* masterpieces *cough* and marvelling or laughing at each other’s creations.
Why it’s great for a sten do: Painting can bring out the inner artist or child within us, making it a great sten do activity for both creative and non-creative folk. Plus, the sip part can be alcoholic or not – you make the rules!
10. A festival
Do you all frequent a festival or have been eyeing one up for a while? Make it your main sten do event! It’s not uncommon for festivals to be the main event of stag and hen dos. Enjoy your favourite artists all in one place!
Why it’s great for a sten do: A lot of the activities are basically planned out for you – just coordinate what bands you want to see, and where you want to stay or camp.
Top tips for an epic sten do
Creating an unforgettable sten do night is about more than just the activities – it’s a mindset. Going in with the right expectations and presence of mind can elevate the entire experience. Here are some tips for making the most of your sten do adventures:
1. Be present
One of the greatest joys of a sten do is the opportunity to fully immerse yourself in novel experiences. Leave your phone behind or on silent, and commit to being engaged in the moment. Don’t let your mind wander to work stresses or daily responsibilities – use this time to really bond with your other half and their close friends and family.
2. Don’t over-plan
While having a general outline is wise, avoid packing too many rigid plans into one night. You’ll miss out on spontaneous magic by feeling rushed from one obligation to the next. Leave ample room in your schedule for wandering, cheerful detours, and discovering pop-up experiences along the way.
3. Just have fun!
A sten do night is a chance to escape the mundanity of life and bond with your partner’s friends and family. Don’t be afraid to get stuck in, get outside your comfort zone, embrace the theatrical staging around you, and commit fully to the elaborate world you’ve entered. You’ll enjoy it far more by setting self-consciousness aside.
No matter which sten do experience you choose, the key is to step out of your comfort zone and embrace the opportunity to create new memories with your partner. These shared adventures can reignite the spark in your relationship and provide a refreshing break from the ordinary. If Alcotraz is up your street and you want to find out more – contact us to enquire about our stag and hen do bookings!